Colts Beat New Orleans Harder Than Katrina
Looks like I'm 1-0 so far with my NFL predictions, though no one could have predicted the absolute ass kicking the Colts handed the Saints in today's 2007 opener. Peyton Manning threw for 288 yards and 3 TDs and the Indianapolis defense was all over Drew Brees and company in a 41-10 Colts victory.

So much for the off-season defections hurting the Colts defense. The media had tagged them inferior to last year's team after guys like Cato June and Jason David left. Well, tonight they certainly didn't look like they missed the old guys. They displayed great speed and that had that "swarming" feeling that all frisky defenses do. David, now with the Saints, was burned numerous times by Marvin Harrison and Reggie Wayne for big catches. What a way to welcome back an ex-teammate.

The Colts looked like they could absolutely repeat as Superbowl winners after dismantling one of the best teams in the NFC. I wouldn't hand the title over to New England just yet. As for the Saints, I still think they'll be fine. In their weaker conference, they'll have no problem repeating last year's 10-6 record once they start playing some home games. And come playoff time, who knows?

The Real Roy Hobbs Juiced
It was reported today that Rick Ankiel received HGH in 2004 while beginning his comeback as an outfielder. The report says that Ankiel stopped getting the stuff after it was officially banned by MLB in 2005, but this still puts an unfortunate stain on an otherwise great story.

Rick Ankiel is Roy Hobbs incarnate. A blue chip pitching prospect who loses his ability to pitch, then makes an unexpected comeback as a power hitting outfielder. The only differences were that Ankiel wasn't shot, didn't have lots of sex with Kim Basinger, and for all we know doesn't carve his bats out of trees that were struck by lightning. But other than that, it's the same story.

This is just a sad sign of the times we live in today, where nothing in baseball is sacred. Everything that seems too good to be true probably is because of widespread juicing. Sometimes I wish we could go back to 70's era baseball where everyone was smaller, leaner, and had porn-star mustaches.

Tomko Resurfaces
Brett Tomko, who the Dodgers let go when they signed David Wells, was picked up this week by none other than ... the San Diego Padres. Of all the teams he could have signed with (and apparently his choices were limited to, oh, about 2) he had to sign with the team the Dodgers are fighting with for the Wild Card lead.

I'm not sure how to feel about this one. Part of me rejoices because the Dodgers will probably get to face him an pummel him like the rest of the league has been doing for years. Another part of me is wary that he will gain superpowers just prior to facing the Dodgers and will end up throwing a no-hitter against us. That kind of thing always seems to happen to us, as evidenced this year by the beating former Dodgers like Shawn Green, Edwin Jackson, and Ted Lilly have given us already. Will Brett Tomko be next? I'm really on the fence about this. It could go either way.